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| Joy Fagenstrom |
Wow... She's done it again-- made it through another life- threatening illness.
3 months ago, we sat around the same table with the hospice nurse Joe and the social worker and talked about mom getting onto hospice. Now Hospice to me always seemed to mean that the end was near.. but I guess that's not necessarily so. Three months ago she had had 2 trips to the Emergency room and a stay in the hospital within about 3 weeks. We had just gotten her home, and I was helping her in the bathroom and she went limp on me. I called Ron and he called 911. They sent the ambulance and firetrucks with sirens to our house (caused quite a stir in our neighborhood, let me tell you) The two trips to the ER amounted to sitting in an ER room, mom being poked and prodded with basically the same info back-- she is probably having TIA's (mini strokes) and there's really nothing they can do for her, she will most likely have another episode.
When those emergency folks came into mom's room (after Ron and I carried her there), she gradually came around. As we stood there, they asked what we wanted to do, one of them suggesting that we again take her to the ER. At that point I looked at Ron and said "No, we are staying here." They had us sign some papers and they left. After they left, Ron and I asked mom- what did she want us to do? Did she want to go back to the hospital, or if she was to die, did she want to be right here in our house. She told us she didn't want to go back to the hospital.
Ron then called mom's doctor and the nurse called back suggesting that she make a referral to hospice. Not only did they make the referral, but the nurse and social worker from Partners in Home Care showed up at our house within 2 hours of the phone call. What a difference that made. We brought mom out to the table, I still remember her sitting there, very confused, her hair messy and barely with us. She was able to answer questions as we filled out the PULST (a form to use in emergencies that tells what her wishes are) They got us connected with a home health aide 2 days a week to give her a bath, a massage therapist 1 day a week, weekly nurse visits, medication management, and a volunteer periodically to come help provide respite. (all these services are covered by Medicare) Nurse Joe would come once a week- check on her and help problem solve issues. One of the first things we did was take her off coumadin .. and soon after take her off the blood pressure medicine. Her med list has been reduced to two meds (from many). She struggled with constipation (I found out later she had been struggling with it for a while) and with Nurse Joe's help- she is more regular than she's been in years! A small thing, but still a huge thing for her. The other big plus was that we never have to call 911 again, we call the hospice number and they come help us out. That was huge for us.
Nurse Joe's weekly visits have been invaluable. As issues have come up, he has helped us problem solve them and mom's life has gotten progressively better. We still struggle with her waking up at night to go to the bathroom (which she doesn't even remember) but she now uses a bell to tell me she needs assistance, and we added a monitor that connects her room and ours so we hear her ringing the bell, moving around or locking and unlocking the brakes on her walker.
Now, Mom is pretty independent in our house. She is more alert and able to get herself to and from the bathroom without assistance. We found a great resource called Home Instead that has caregivers who come into our home on a daily basis for an hour in the morning. Help her get up, get dressed, get breakfast and do some household chores so Ron and I can get our daily walk and time away from the house.
Ron and I have gotten into a rhythm. Being retired is very helpful, we can basically do this care as well as having the opportunity to do childcare for our new granddaughter Bethany two days a week.
So... mom graduates from Hospice. What does that mean? We will hire someone through Home Instead two more days a week to help with showering and she will have to pay for medications and other services. If she does have an episode, we can choose not to call 911 and call her doctor and if need be, get back onto Hospice. But for now... we are settled in and so thankful for the supports we do have- including my siblings, our kids and our church family. So... Hospice was there when we needed it... and we are thankful!
